Dear Diary

Tonight I'm going to see Junior Senior at Spaceland. Those danes (?) are crazy!

In my dream last night, I had a baby. Not that I "had" a baby as in gave birth to one, but more like poof, I have a baby. And I kept misplacing it. What does that mean? I even almost rolled over it, it was sleeping beside me but I forgot it was there. Then I think it started talking. Yes, that's when thing got weird.

Ashley has come up with a great new dieting idea. She calls it "the gb diet" which means you eat like you've had gastric bypass surgery without actually getting the surgery. I think they can have like one ounce of food per meal or something like that. No wonder Nicole Richie is so freaking thin, her lover DJ AM's on the gb diet (but for real) so she prob doesn't want to feel like a fat ass.

Yesterday my boredom was entertaining. Today it's a different story. It's so quiet in my office. Like the kind of quiet that in a horror movie would imply impending doom. If the lights were off, I'd be a little scared.

I'm way too picky. I need to lower my standards. At least I need to assess my level of hottness and try to find someone who fits within the upper eschalon of its limits. Basically, find the hottest guy that I can plausibly get. Oh, but he has to be funny and nice too. Maybe I need to give up one of those demands. Okay, he doesn't have to be nice.

I'm going to Vegas for the fourth of July. I have no money, so this is probably a bad idea. But I'm really good at having bad ideas. Speaking of...in order to make some extra cash to help me live the lifestyle to which I've become accustomed (barely middle-class), I'm going to start working the Promenade on the weekends with a table where people can take their picture with me. Why? Just because. I might even make t-shirts (aka use magic marker to write on the cheapest white tee I can buy). The tourists will eat. it. up.

I'm wearing a pretty pink skirt today. I feel like a princess. Who's been foreced into assistant slavery.

I need more IM friends so that there is a never a dull moment.
R.